MRI

Yet another waiting room filled with people who were at least 20 years older than me. Even though I expect it, I have never gotten used to it. Not only do I feel out of place, but it reminds me how unlucky my situation is. I get jealous of all the people in good health, and all the years spent without the anxiety that comes with a diagnosis like cancer or BRCA positive. I am also extremely  jealous of the lack of medical bills. I almost started crying when I saw how much the MRI cost me.

After checking in, a nurse led me to small curtained area outside of the MRI room. She asked a lot of medical questions that I can't remember, I was too busy staring at the MRI machine through the little window in the door in front of me. I was not looking forward to this.

I had to change out of all my clothes except for my underwear. I couldn't wear jewelry, and was asked to not wear perfume or deodorant. I was swimming in the one-size-fits-most hospital gown, pants, and socks. They gave me socks that said XXL on the bottom. I wear a size 8.5 shoe, those socks are downright dangerous. Yes, they have grips for not slipping, but that doesn't mean they aren't a tripping hazard.

Someone, please redesign these horrid hospital clothes!

The least glamorous part were little sticker orb things they put on my nipples and my biopsy site. These apparently show up like a marker in the MRI. I sat on the table next to the MRI machine while they put a catheter in a vein on my hand, so they could inject contrast dye as needed.

A view from above. The markers on my nipple and biopsy site. 

Positioning for the MRI was difficult to say the least. I had to lay down on my stomach on a table that was slightly tilted forward, with my face resting in a hole, and my breasts dangling through openings in the table. My arms needed to be kept at my sides. My IV hand was positioned carefully, so I didn't accidentally pull the IV out. The nurse placed a small device in my other hand, to squeeze if I needed the MRI to stop for any reason. She cautioned me to try not to push the button though. Due to the contrast through my IV, if the MRI was stopped, I would have to come back on another day and do it all over again. There were some tough moments since I am claustrophobic. But it helped that my head was facing downward, I could pretend that the rest of my body was not in a small tube. Also, the nurse had placed headphones on my ears so I could listen to music. 

Back in her booth outside of the room, the nurse asked over the intercom what type of music I listen to, I answered alternative rock. The table moved into the tube and the music started. I heard Kurt Cobain's voice start crooning:

I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black.

You can't make this shit up. Those were the first lyrics I heard after she the music was turned on. I almost started laughing at the absurdity of the situation. I wish you could eat my cancer too, Kurt.

Soon, the nurse's voice came through the headphones and told me the machine would start taking images. The music which had seemed loud in my ears was now almost drowned out by the noise of the machine. There would be periods of intense noise from the machine, then silence other than my music. The nurse would always let me know when the next session would start and how long it would take. I tried to count the seconds, counting slowly. I rapidly became convinced the nurse was lying to me. What she said would be 30 minutes total has to be almost an hour. By the end of the MRI, I was lightheaded and maybe a little delirious. My face hurt from the pressure of how I was positioned. The nurse helped me up slowly. I am sure people have passed out before.

Time for a little info about MRIs in case anyone is wondering. MRI is an advanced way of taking pictures of tissue. It is like slicing a loaf of bread so you can examine smaller pieces to look for problems. I was already diagnosed with cancer, but this let my doctors get a full view of my lump and make sure no other breast tissue was affected. No one imaging test is 100% accurate, so doing multiple tests helps to make sure nothing was missed

Most hospitals will try to schedule a breast MRI based on where you are in your menstrual cycle, because apparently that can affect how breast tissue appears. The human body is crazy. Since I was diagnosed with cancer, it was more of a get-it-done type of scheduling. 

I had fasted 12 hours for the test. It wasn't for a strictly medical reason, you don't need to drink barium for an MRI. However, for a breast MRI, you need to lay on your stomach at a slightly forward slant for a long time, which could easily cause some vomiting. You don't want to have to stop the test for that.

The machine uses magnets, so don't wear jewelry, and make sure your nurse knows if you have any metal in your body. I had a small coil in my biopsy site, but these are purposefully not metal. You don't want one coming out of your breast like a tiny xenomorph chestburster during an MRI.

A radiologist will get the results and review them, just like an x-ray or a mammogram. I was relieved when I heard that the MRI confirmed all my other results. The lump was less than 2 centimeters, and there were no other suspicious areas. But now, I had to schedule the surgery.